I’m not sure what I’m going to do with the blog, but here’s what is happening with my other stuff.

My writing, specifically the Gobshite ‘Saga’ is moving to my Google Site iamariter.

My music, what there is of it, will now be posted to my BandCamp page JazzChicken – There will be a lot more music there soon, quality unknown, because I will be doing the RPM challenge next month, which is basically NaNoWriMo for music.

If you don’t know what either the RPM challenge or NaNoWriMo are, then Google them you lazy git.

If you want to read more of my witty blog posts when I write them, tough. I don’t plan to write any. If I do write something it’ll probably be posted as an article on iamariter so look there from time to time if you want.

So… yeah. I’ll see you around.

Here’s the original video. If you want to go straight to the recruitment video, go to the next one, because that’s the one with full details of how to sign up, and details of the full scope of their mission.

Emo Assault Squadron 1 – The original video

Emo Assault Squadron 2 – Recruitment video.

Do your bit, sign up today at http://www.sorpfilms.net!

Psst, it’s a joke. Just making sure you know, because you never know how daft people can be.

For once, instead of abandoning a track half way through writing it, I’ve actually FINISHED ONE!

Ladies and Gentlemens, I introduce to ye, Monophonic Mongoose by Giltrap:

It’s not anything massively complicated but it’s a start; and more importantly it’s a finish. I have 9 other projects that I’ve started and not finished, but hopefully, sooner or later, you’ll see more.

However, just realising that boredom is all in the mind can help alleviate it, if not get rid of it all together. A few minutes before I started writing this blog post, I was so bored that they could have erected a monument in honor of my services to boredom. However, I then realised that what I was feeling was all in the mind, and it mostly went. I’m writing this to get rid of the remainder, which brings me on to my second tactic for getting rid of boredom: Just do something.

Since most of my boredom stems from wanting to do something, but having no idea what to do, I find that just doing anything can help. For instance, I started writing this blog post. If nothing else, the act of writing this will help distract me from my thoughts about how bored I was, so as a result I won’t be bored any more. Of course, since I’m writing about boredom I’ll still be thinking about boredom, so perhaps writing this post wasn’t a flawless plan after all. Well, at least I’m doing something to keep my mind busy.

On the other hand, I’d imagine that meditating could count as doing something, but it’s also sort of doing nothing. However, if your mind is spinning with “OH MY GOD I’M SO BORED” then it might not work. Then again, if you were good enough at meditation you could silence those thoughts and then everything would be fine. It’s just another way of stopping yourself thinking about being bored, I suppose.

Well, I’m feeling less bored now, and I hope you will feel less bored too.

Now I need to find something else to do.

I was inspired by Leo Babauta’s blog mnmlist.com which recently moved to having a 400 word limit. I’m going to follow suit and have a 500 word limit. I’ve decided to have an extra 100 words so I can squeeze in an extra bit of waffle, and also it’s a nice round number. I think 400 is a bit weird.

It’s almost certain that I’m going to need to go over that limit on my rambling rants, but so what? It’s not a hard, set in stone limit, more of a guideline. I mean, I’m at 84 words now.

The truth is, I don’t need to write blog and peace, I only need to get my message across.

This post’s word count: 140. Haha, Twitter-esque. =P

I don’t really know very much about lucid dreaming as I have only had 2 of them so far so unfortunately I can’t teach you to fly, and both dreams were both pretty much accidental too. However, lucid dreaming is completely awesome and I want to find out more, so I’d recommend you try it too.

From what I’ve read so far there are several ways to trigger a lucid dream. There are:

• Dream-Initiated Lucid Dream (DILD) where you become aware you’re dreaming during the dream
• Wake-Initiated Lucid Dream (WILD) where you go straight into a lucid dream as soon as you’re asleep
• Mnemonic-Initiated Lucid Dream (MILD, notice the theme =D) where you set your intention to recognise you’re dreaming (I think)

Both of my lucid dreams have been DILD’s. I myself use the Breathing Through a Closed Nose Reality Check, which is this (taken off the Reality Check article on Lucidwiki):

1. Clasp your nose tight between your fingers, and keep your mouth shut
2. Attempt to breath in through your nose.
3. If you find that you can breath in as usual, you are most likely dreaming.

My latest lucid dream wasn’t particularly exciting, it mostly consisted of me trying to keep myself calm enough so that I wouldn’t wake up, and then I tried to stop my computer turning itself off which in my mind equated with me waking up. The thing is I was controlling my computer as if it was a touch screen, but I wasn’t even touching it.

Technology doesn’t work as it does in the real world. As a result, you can use light switches as a reality check. If they don’t work as expected, you’re dreaming.

Of course, like most things, to get better at lucid dreaming you need to practice. The first time I had a lucid dream I woke up almost immediately because I was too excited, but this time I managed to stick with it for a while. Next I think I need to increase my amount of lucidity because after the initial realisation it began to lose clarity.

Eventually, I may be able to deliberately fly like Neo in my dreams.

And that’s going be friggin’ awesome!

Here are some articles I’ve been looking at.

• A beginners guide to Lucid Dreaming @ World of Lucid Dreaming
• Lucid Dreaming FAQ @ World of Lucid Dreaming
• How to fly in a lucid dream @ Ezinearticles
• How Lucid Dreaming Works @ Howstuffworks
• Lucid Wiki

However, back then I hadn’t the foggiest idea on how to actually achieve such a thing. I had no experience in programming, I didn’t know how to get the appropriate sensors cheaply, and I had no idea on how to get the electronics done

In other words, I had no idea what I was doing, so after a good start where we (my dad and I) got a basic frame built, the project ground to a halt as we were stuck on what to do next.

However, a few months ago I had a brainwave, and the ball was rolling again!

I realised that the Wiimote and the Nunchuck adapter had sensors in it that could be used, so I started to look into that. Some other people had done some code I could have used, but it confused the hell out of me, so I eventually gave up on that and looked for an easier solution.

I settled for an idea that I previously considered to be “cheating”. I decided to use two IR sensors to measure the distance from the floor, and use that to balance things out. In a nutshell, it measures how far from the front and back are away from the floor, finds the midpoint between the two, and then the motor either runs forwards or backwards to try to get the sensors to reach the midpoint.

It’s a bit more complicated than that, but that pretty much covers it. I’ll probably post the code later, when I actually get it working properly.

Anyway, that’s what I’ve been doing for the past… while. That’s why I’ve had massive delays in my posting of my JulNo attempt “Gobshite”. Well, that and going to 6th form and sorting that out too. I’ve been busy, for once in my life.

I know, amazing isn’t it?

So, expect some awesome pictures and maybe even video of a homebuilt segway skateboard coming to an ownageparty near you!

I wasn’t going to pay 11p a text simply to update the world on what I was doing, so I decided to write them all down on paper, and post them all here now upon my return.

I make no promises whatsoever that these are anywhere near the 140 character Twitter limit. I just wrote a few sentences. I can’t be bothered to go through them and shorten them now, so it’s just tough tit.

I have included where I was at the particular time. For the ones where there is no location, I was probably at the Villa at the time of writing. Also, there are a few that I have written and backdated due to massive gaps, but I think they’re pretty accurate.

Anyway, here we go.

Fri 14th

Earlier in the day – Travelling (backdated)
On the way to Luton to check into a hotel so we don’t have to do a mad dash in the morning to get on our flight.

23:21 – Hotel in Luton
Sleep at 11:00? Unheard of. It’s usually 4 am for me. :)

Sat 15th

04:00 (backdated)
Got up. I didn’t know there were two 4 o’clocks in the day.

05:00 – Luton Airport (backdated, time estimated)
Anarchy ensues getting parked and checked in. They think we’re late, we think we aren’t. We get pushed to the front of multiple queues. Eventually we’re on the plane and flying. Even though we stayed at a hotel, we still had a mad dash.

07:00 – On the plane
I should’ve expectd a Twilight reference in an article about a Greek “Vampire island” in the inflight magazine. I was asking for that one. I am an idiot.

07:30
Learnt knockout whist. Won.

12:00 – Lisbon Airport
Waiting for the German half of our group to arrive.

21:00 – Villa
Fell sleep knackered. Didn’t sleep before flight.

Sun 16th

12:00 – A Beach
Considered buying Twilight in Portugese but realised I’d only learn the words for “Sparkling”, “Beautiful” and ”Perfect” so didn’t bother. Besides, reading it once was more than enough.

22:15 – Villa
Got sunburnt IN SLIGHT FOG. Can understand how much the sun is appreciated by Vampires (but not sparkly leech men).

Mon 17th

12:20
I could do without the sun. My arms are still stinging from yesterday.

17:15 – Supermarket (?)
Actually found Twilight in Portugese. Considered buying it for the lulz until I realised there wasn’t any to be had.

18:50 – Villa
Got back from the beach. Used suncream so probably not burnt. We’ll see.

19:30
Had a shower. Hot water ran out immediately after I finished my hair. Froze myself to death washing the rest of me.

23:49
Worked out how to calculate the number of pins in any given bowling set up from the number of rows.

Tue 18th

21:30
Got back from the beach. Didn’t burn. Went in the sea for 1 sec (it was cold). Now going to play cards.

Wed 19th

15:55
My cousins need a nice big cup of shut the fuck up. I don’t want to do much today. Leave me in peace. Now, what to do for entertainment…

21:05
I have decided to finish my novel and post it weekly from the 1st of September onwards.

Thu 20th

11:55
I think I might have had a lucid dream last night by accident; then again, maybe not. Read some of Glamorama and I might edit my own novel. I need to eat and scrub.

21:39
Crazy people (my family) are playing Ligretto next to me and making a lot of noise. Sounds like fun. (And I know it is)

Fri 21st

04:45
Just engaged in a “personal protein spill”. I feel much better now. Meat does not agree with me any more.

13:05
Felt really bad all night but I’m better now. Ate some toast which I haven’t brought back up so I think I’m fine.

13:11
We have a “News of the world” CD called “Sunday Love”. Does Sunday make love extra special, or is it just a disk of love songs which are DRM restricted to being played on Sunday?

13:47
New novel idea: Barry Scotter and the Wizard formerly known as Prince.

19:45
Thinking about Jet Engines and Boats. Watching The Ashes Cricket on Channel 5.

Sat 22nd

16:35
Today I have been ill again, ate, played uno and seen the end of “Cool Runnings” again. Instructed Grandma as to how to use the TV over 1 million times.

21:31
In Glamorama a minor character called “Stephanie Meyers” dies horiffically. This pleases me.

22:18
Finished Glamorama. It was good. Now going to bed.

Sun 23rd

18:43
Got back from being out. Bought a watch. Grandad singing + scaring people. Noticed plans never realy work, thinking about “winging it” at life. Feeling a little “ehh”

21:45
Looking at a Portugese newspaper. Something to do with Obama and people who look like the KKK. Wondering why the KKK wear such stupid clothes.

Mon 24th

19:39
Was well last night. Ate fish soup so we’ll see about tonight. Was “bored out my tree” earlier and now I’m wondering about that particular phrase.

22:42
I’m strange. I just realised I don’t want to be thanked for thoughtfulness, but I still want to be appreciated.

Tue 25th

18:30
Youngest cousin (2) decided to throw a quilt on me (punching me in the process) and then generally run about. Confusing, butdamned funny.

22:07
Played Bejeweled on mums phone + done some crosswords. Bored out my tree. Might edit my novel.

Wed 26th

09:40
Got up. Noticed that I really like the word “Incredulous”

09:45
Going to read more 1984 by George Orwell, which I started reading yesterday.

10:17
Sometimes it seems that thinking “Twilight Sucks” is a thoughtcrime.

21:38
Also, Anonymous sounds both like “The Party” and also it’s complete opposite. Doublethink, perhaps?

23:30
Finished 1984. Now I don’t know what to think or say. Damn. Is truth powerful? IDK. =(

23:40
Radical Honesty may be the only protection against “thoughtcrimes” coming into existance. On that note, I’m going for a piss and then to bed. (The other way around would be too messy)

Thu 27th

Entire day (written on the 28th)
Walked around a town with my mother and went to a pretty lousy market. Had pizza twice.

Fri 28th

10:30
Mother just said she has the skin tone of a fridge. I lol’d. So true.

10:40
Eating biscuits. Cousins running around like loons. Need to pack for early departure tomorrow. Flight time = Sparrows Fart.

21:15
Back from walking around Obidos. Took some pictures. Ate a nice meal. Bags are nearly packed.

Sat 29th

16:14 – Home
Got back from Portugal. Flight was okay. Car park was cheaper than expected. Now writing this blog post. GCSE results weren’t bad.

17:21
Finished copying out all of the things I wrote while on holiday. There are quite a few holes in what I did, but ehh, sod it.

And that’s it!

I’m very much aware that you’re probably not going to be that bothered about my holiday if you’re a casual visitor who has stumbled upon my site, but for the few who give a damn about what I’m doing who follow me on Twitter, this was what I got up to.

Later on I might upload some of the photographs I took, but that’s going to be much later. As you can see it’s taken me about an hour to write this, and I need a break.

To the internet! Oh how I have missed thee!

Actually, truth be told, the break from it was nice.

Back in the depths of time there was a point when I was following approximately one hundred million webcomics. As you may expect, following this many webcomics can become a little tedious, so I figured I needed to do something about it.

I decided to pick one single web-comic to read on a regular basis.

It would have to be the best of the best, an Übercomic. I don’t actually have any idea what I look for in a webcomic, although humour and cleverness are definitely in there. But even though I wasn’t entirely sure on the criteria I was using to decide, I still found it easy to pick a winner.

I chose the one I liked the most.

And that was…

Basic Instructions

If you didn’t see that coming then I’m sure you’ll make good friends with Captain Obvious.

There are several reasons why I like Basic Instructions, even if I’m not sure on what all those reasons actually are. Here are a few: The concept is a simple yet very good and as there isn’t a storyline between the strips as such it means you can read any of them and it’ll still make perfect sense. Also, there’s the added bonus of some really useful advice for life. You can’t go wrong!

I’m not sure how else to explain why I like it so much, I’m much better at giving criticism, but I don’t have any in this case. I think there needs to be a set of “How to Explain Why You Like Basic Instructions So Much” instructions.

And now, I’ll leave you with one of my favourites (although they’re all great in my opinion).

I'm currently developing the Force Feedback Codpiece

Okay, I lied, I’m still here. Here are some more:

• How to Fake a Smile
• How to Set Someone Straight
• How to Express Condolences
• How to Tell If Someone Is Dangerously Crazy
• How to Develop a Personal Alternative to Waving
• How to Share a Movie You Love with the Person You Love

And if none of those convinced you, then I clearly have some setting straight to do.

Thank god for Basic Instructions.

For those not in the know, JulNoWriMo stands for July Novel Writing Month. Basically, the idea is to write 50,000 words of novel within the 31 days of July. It doesn’t have to be good, it doesn’t have to make sense, and it doesn’t even have to have a storyline; the only requirement is that it reaches more than 50,000 words before the end of July. It’s that simple (in theory).

Anyway, for JulNoWriMo this year I have decided to write a novel which will put me in great personal danger. Now, I can hear you say, “how can a novel possibly be dangerous?” Quite easily, especially when it’s a mockery of Twilight. The fangirls are going to want to kill me, and with good reason.

If you would like to support me in writing my novel, then you may wish to donate to my “Hire Giltrap some bodyguards to defend him from angry fangirls fund.” All donations are greatly appreciated.

As I have only just finished the first draft, but wish to make it available to the public as soon as possible, I am going to release it chapter by chapter as I finish editing them. When each chapter is done, I will post it on my JulNoWriMo 2009 page, and I might write a post on here, or at the very least make a Twitter comment about it.

Anyway, I’m going to go edit now. I’m going to get the blurb finished and posted ASAP.